Meeting George Clooney in another life

My next life is all planned out. Right down to the last detail and there’s no room for surprises, good or otherwise. It will be a life filled with breathless excitement where every moment will be stretched tight with no creases. I see myself gliding gracefully through events, happenings, the odd disappointments…without a stutter. And of course I will be perfect in looks, intellect, wit, body shape, achievements, talent, confidence, ability to deflect jealousy and animosity….you get the idea. In short, there will not be a imperfect molecule in my body. So George Clooney, here I come! That perfect wife of yours will pale in comparison!

Let’s get one thing out of the way. I’m okay with my imperfections in this life. But in the interests of evolution I figured that there should be a leap forward, not a step, but a leap towards perfection while planning my next life. After all, didn’t someone mention that only if there’s something substantial to look forward to can one talk of another life. Oh wait, I think I said that once just after I had polished off a third glass of wine which literally was one too many. But that’s a topic for another rainy day. Unlike a friend who shall remain unnamed , I have no desire to be reborn as a fruit fly or a tempestuous praying mantis or even as a lurid coloured cockatoo. I want to be reborn as someone so perfect that I would, without asking for it, be granted a date with George Clooney which I will accept with a bored shrug of my delicately perfect shoulders.

As you can tell by my Freudian choice of words, perfection is big on my list. It is. Because perfection is life’s way of giving one a head start. So that when the race begins the perfect will glide forward effortlessly to the finish line while the ordinary will have to struggle through wondering whether the finish line is real or just a mirage.

The million dollar question however is, how come George Clooney continues to be George Clooney in my next life. Well, since it’s my next life and I’m arranging it down to the last detail that’s the way it works.  Some things should never change however many lives one goes through.